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Dreams :: Interpretations

Ok so I am in a funk. This funk has been caused by a series, yes series of dreams that I can't quite understand. I haven't been dreaming very much, but the last couple nights, they have been very vivid and memorable in my mind. So the only way to get out of this and not burden my friends/family/priest, I'll spilll the beans here and try to lay it all out.

Dream one: Family, loss, death of Shayan

Ok so this was wierd. I can only paraphrase because it was the other day. But basically for some reason I was creeping around outside my Uncles Corey's house. And I'm nto sure why. But I noticed that he was home and with what looked like a garden party or something. Not really sure. Then I started to feel left out because, why wasn't I invited. Then as I walked around the house I was somewhere else, at a home I didn't know. It was a huge family and everyone was crying. Then I found out my friend Shayan had died and no one told me. It was service at the home and everyone was eating and crying and talking about him.

Interpretation: Now Shayan are at many times, at odds. We aren't close close but I'd say he's like a brother/cousin who teases me and pushes my buttons because I'm always the butt of the joke. But I do care about him and our friendship. Why I dreamed this I don't know. I'm traveling with him soon and I hang out with him alot. Maybe its because I don't know him well and I want to. Maybe it's because he feels like family and if I never saw him again I would be sad. I don't know. but it was a very odd dream that he died.

Dream Two: Brian's impending death, euthanizing, service, funeral

So my ex-boyfriend and best friend who I am currently very close with is diagnosed with almost a due date on when he'll die. So he knows it. And instead of making the best of it, he decides to plan a service while he's alive and then at the end kill himself essentially. But the whole thing seems to be a normal ritual everyone knows. Except I'm the only one that disapproves. I'm the only one fighting for his life. But I keep having to fight to be a part of the service. And all these girls that don't matter and trying to get his attention. But no one seems to care that I'm his closest person. He doesn't tell his mom. It just his friends and me and some random people who claim to know him. we are in the car on the way to the final place and we are laughing and talking about what stuff I can sell and what I should keep. It breaks my heart. And we are at the ceremony and theres a wooden coffin or something and he's still alive but they are about to end it. And he's totally fine with it, not scared, just ready. And nothing I say gets through to him. To him, he's already dead... and I feel dead without him. not sure where that goes from there, but it's an intense feeling of loss, that I've lost him. He's already let go.

Interpretation: Ok I didn't see it before but now I do. Clearly the break up is what this is. We are like together but clearly not. By trying to be friends I feel apart because I'm not his but together because we act like that sometimes. It feels like a casual friendship us these days. He's going through a lot of hard times and I've been there for him. Nothing will change his negative mind or perspective on the world and I know for sure I cannot marry someone who is this way. I feel like we died. but I'm so happy for our friendship. I only want that really more than anything, because I will be happier with someone else. It's just hard to actually separate when we still love each other. I care for him so much and I can honestly say I've never felt this way for anyone before. But I have a feeling that's why I dreamed this. I'm still sad.

Dream Three: Cara is dying

This one I can't really remember as well as the others, but it is the most recent. She's one of my new friends who I am trying to get to know better. All I remember is that she died and that I was hysterically crying because I couldn't understand why. I felt alone and without her I didn't know what to do.

Interpret: We aren't that close really, but I wish I could see her more. We get along really well and have similarities and boy issues. This one confused me alot because I really don't know why I would bring her into a dream or think about her dying. Still don't know.

On dreams...

"To dream about the death of a loved one, suggests that you are lacking a certain aspect or quality that the loved one embodies. Ask yourself what makes this person special or what do you like about him. It is that very quality that you are lacking in your own relationship or circumstances. Alternatively, it indicates that whatever that person represents has no part in your own life.
To dream of your own death, indicates a transitional phase in your life. You are becoming more enlightened or spiritual. Alternatively, you are trying desperately to escape the demands of your daily life."

courtesy of

I've got a lot going on. But I'm pretty happy. I have freedom and people who care about me all around me, I haven't been as negative. I'm singing again and believing on myself and my music. It's good. But why would 3 people who I'm trying to keep die in my dreams...
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